[It looks that way, the way you say
She talks as if she knows]
I do not know that this is so, I only just suppose
I suppose that when you come into the ballroom
And the room itself is floating in the air
If you're suddenly confronted by his highness
You are frozen like a statue on the stair
You're afraid he'll hear the way your heart is beating
And you know you mustn't make the first advance
You are seriously thinking of retreating
Then you seem to hear him asking you to dance

A lovely night,
A lovely night
A finer night you'll know you'll never see
You'll meet your prince
A charming prince
As charming as a prince will ever be

The stars in the hazy heaven
Tremble above you
While he is whispering, "darling I love you"
You say good-bye
Away you fly

But on your lips you keep a kiss
All your life you'll dream of this
Lovely, Lovely night

sorry for the misinformation.. but i dun think he kan go vs, which is really sad.
yesterday was interesting, to say the least. but mostly draining. the afternoon kinda sucked, so i went home and slept it away..
but the evening was GREAT. when i reached the hotel, i waited for denise in the lobby, and there was a HOT lim sitting there!!! i died. oh, and stupid volleyball girl was there, but..let's just forget her.. haha.. erm.. sembahyanging was fine.. i looked fine but still fat.. but no one cared.. it was a wonderful night, lots of taking pics and all, and doing the class item was fun.. apparently it was hilarious, too.. and since lira got third, it must have been a good item rite? hehe. and guess what? aimee got first!!! isn't that great?? it's sooooooo cool!!! yah then after that we went up to the room and watched tv and took more pics and whatevered.. and then yaxin me rachel tzing adeline did unbeatables stuff with shiming's cards.. hehe.. i kinda sucked at the whole spreading-out-the-cards thing.. but i did win, once or twice, with a king or so.. hehe.. and then we played blackjack, with me as the dealer.. so fun.. and we threw cards at each other, which was really dumb but still farn.. yah so anyway like i sed i had fun. and at midnight my sister came and i left.. and i was in the lift with this lim!!! she was with her girlfriend i guess.. and she has blond hair and she's tall, wearing a nice checked shirt and jeans.. nice voice too.. soothing and stuff.. hahah.. yeah isn't it cool? to round off my day with a great lim? i can't think of a better way to start and end a lovely experience..
tata!

well my brother got one A, one A*, one B and another A i think.. aggregate was 237.. kan't make it to ri, unfortunately, but i think kan go vs.. so.. *phew*
im having a really bad day. i can't wait for it to be over. stupid prom. stupid me. why i wanted to go in the first place, i'll never know. pray for me.. and later when it's all over, i'll pray isyak and thank God for letting it be finally over.
im gonna go do my PAE now.. so.. bye.

ohyes valarmathi prob took lit paper 8!

toe ring.

Ain't That Funny
[Ja Rule]
Murda Inc
Haha it must be the ass
That got me like that
If it get any fatter
Man the rule gonna hafta get at her
And our situation won't matter
I come to make you smile
In the freakiest manners
J to the L-O
Hello, no I'm not Lee Harvey Oswald
I'm the rule in the shot call
Off the wall
Like MJ in his early days
It's the Inc. and Lopez now

[Jennifer Lopez]
Ain't that funny
It's been awhile since you came around
Now ya wanna see what's goin' down
Tryin' to tell me how ya want my time
Tryin' to tell me how I'm on your mind (on your mind)
See it never had to be this way
You should've never played the games you played
Now I'm seein' that you're kinda lame
Knowin how the situation changed

[chorus]
Ain't that funny
Baby that you want me, when you had me
Love is crazy, now I can smile and say
Ain't that funny
Baby that you want me, when you had me
Love is crazy, I'm glad I can smile and say
Ain't that funny

[Jennifer Lopez]
I remember how you walked away
Even when I tried to call your name
See at first I didn't understand
Now you're lookin' like a lonely man (lonely man)
I remember how you did me wrong
And now you're hurtin' cuz my love is gone
Everybody gets a chance to burn
You can take it as a lesson learned

[chorus]

[Caddillac Tah]
C-A double D, Hi
Double dose my
Fly by, red line
Touch the roast side
Oh I, never been a sucker for chill Ja
Spit the ism, hit em, get rid of em, and you know Tah
Get it gully, and ain't that funny
How they want me, see me workin' wit money
But Cali ain't a dummy
What these brodies want from me?
Cos all I got is G, J.Lo
And Murda I.N.C.

[Jennifer Lopez]
I really wish you wouldn't send me gifts
Tryin' to make me sit and reminisce
Tryin' to blind me with your bling bling
Thought I told you love don't cost a thing
(love don't cost a thing)
Hope you realize that now I'm through
And I don't ever wanna hear from you
I had enough of bein' there for you
Now I'm laughin' while you play the fool

[chorus]

[Jennifer Lopez]
Baby, is that you're girlfriend
I got my boyfriend

[Jennifer Lopez & Ja Rule]
But maybe we can be friends
La da da da da da

[Jennifer Lopez]
Baby, I got my boyfriend
Is that your girlfriend

[Jennifer Lopez & Ja Rule]
maybe we can be friends
La da da da da da

Ain't it funny

im dying. im soooooooooooooo tired. i could just keel over and die now. haha. shows how little stamina i have, huh.. anyway.. i walked around orchard today.. checked out the new far east basement, which is SO cool! and we saw lotsa people.. valarmathi.. and i dunno who else but i know there were thousands of lims, mostly the kind i like.. hahah.. and there were lotsa cool shops in the basement.. including this collectors' shop, with lots and lots of those old kiddy stuffs like care bears and the my little pony thingies.. sho cool! of course, catering only to the rich..
i was peacefully reading my PAE booklet on the way home and then siti called me. yeurgh. as in, i like siti, she's nice and all.. and maybe under normal circumstances we could find common ground to talk about, but.. she kept talking about mai and asking me to go out with them.. NOT IN A MILLION YEARS! i refuse to see mai again. she makes my blood boil. and i know she might not necessarily advocate this whole ask-ain-if-she-wants-to-reconcile thing, but STILL. she's the subject of it, innit? hmph. and i dun like her. she makes me angry now. so yah. please. everyone, get the point. AND. beer is better. gimme beer any day. i know that's almost sinful to say, but.. i dunno. i suppose i prefer assertive to shy. hahah. but i hate both of them anyway.

i love having a blog. it's like, whenever im online, and i don't know what else to do, i just log in and start typing. kwite fun.
im burning a new cd now.. it has perhaps perhaps perhaps and quando quando quando.. hehe.. i guess songs of those period tend to have the same format.. but they're still lovely.. i'd rather listen to those than, say, "pop".. i mean, puh-leeze.. oh it's azan already.. but im gonna wait till this cd is done.. i have lots of time to burn anyway.
you know, im still kinda reeling from yesterday's experiences.. mainly the fila lim one. i just totally did not expect to see her.. and like, for so long.. i dunno.. i realised that the last time i saw her was more than a month ago.. and i guess im not gonna see her anymore.. seeing as she's not in sec 4 and all.. or doesn't take o's, anyway.. it's pretty sad.. like i've always said, i've always wanted a friend living near me.. then we could hang out together.. it would be so fun.. and i know fila lim is a fun friend to have.. u kan just tell by looking at her. problem is, i dun see why she has to be so aloof with strangers.. there is [and was] absolutely no way i would get to smile at her, so how am i supposed to be friends with her? i guess it's not meant to be. maybe she's just meant to be a pick-me-up, for when im really mad or sad. and have you ever noticed, you never get what you want when you want it..you get what you want when you need it.. which is cool in a way.. but not cool cos you want it this moment, but you get it at another moment. but it's just the way things go.

i watched notting hill again last night.. i truly love it..
"..it's the sort of thing that happens in dreams.. good dreams.."
"and what happens next in the dream?"
"well, i'd sort of change my personality--you can do that in dreams--and i'd get up, walk over, and kiss you."

"..i'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.."

you won't admit you love me
and so how am i ever to know
you always tell me
perhaps perhaps perhaps

a million times i've asked you
and then
i ask you over
again
you only answer
perhaps perhaps perhaps

if you can't make your mind up
we'll never get started
and i don't wanna wind up
being parted
broken-hearted

so if you really love me
say yes
but if you don't dear
confess
and please don't tell me
perhaps perhaps perhaps

if you can't make your mind up
we'll never get started
and i don't wanna wind up
being parted
broken-hearted

so if you really love me
say yes
but if you don't dear
confess
and please don't tell me
perhaps perhaps perhaps
perhaps perhaps perhaps
perhaps perhaps perhaps

i used to always say that things happen when you least expect them too. but i stopped saying that for some time cos nothing much really happened to me.. and today.. something happened that proved my statement true again. i wouldn't mind if it happened again and again and again. what am i talking about? well, i'll come to it later..
i was in 105 home and just wondering--have i ever made any of my friends so angry at me that they almost hated me? i still wonder. and i wonder what i would have done to make them mad at me.. did i cancel out on plans? did i disappoint them in some way by forgetting to bring something important? did i insult them so bad till it hurt? did i brag so much about something that they'd never achieve? and i wonder exactly how mad they were. did they dig their fingernails deep into their palms until it left a mark? did they scream out their anger? did they cry for hours and hours? did they just let their mind wander aimlessly while rotting in anger? did they resolve never to be friends with me again? did they shout out curses? did they curse ME? --yeah anyway.. if anyone has any answers to the above, do not hesitate to tell me. i really wonder. it's another of those big mysteries. i feel really bad. if i have ever made any of my friends this mad at me, im really sorry.. i seriously did not mean any hurt, but i know it won't take away the hurt. and now i realise how hurtful it all is, and although apologies won't have much of an effect, im still very very sorry. i am. i hope i never give them any cause to be mad at me again.
so there i was, fuming silently in the bus. and then i alighted and continued to fume in 53.. but i was slightly pacified by the sight of about a billion pl lims walking all over the school.. and there was a considerable number of pl gerls wearing their uniform and their school jacket, which, actually, is not that nice but it's like haute couture to me.. hehe.. i looked around at the lims outside without really seeing any of them, and only one person boarded the bus. the moment i saw her, i was like, hey, floppy hair.......FILA LIM! it was her! in the flesh! she's not dead after all! not even ill, she looks fine and well.. she was one of those wearing the skl uni and skl jacket.. and she wasn't carrying a bag, just some papers and stuff.. including a school newsletter which she was flipping through.. it's the same old fila lim. same old floppy hair [which is like JP's but without such obvious feelers], same pinafore, same chubby-ish face, and lovely eyes and socks and shoes. and same old habit of glancing discreetly to the back. i was sitting riiiight at the back, in the right corner, and she sat next to the aisle, the row infront of me, but on the left of the bus. [i was wearing my fila socks today, but a strange stroke of coincidence. plus i had to wait about a thousand years--and 2 more 105s--for 53 to arrive. therefore i conclude that it was fate.] there isn't a day that goes by at the fila lim bus stop, that i don't look across the road and think of her. i am so happyterharu at seeing her again today, after so manymanymany weeks of not. and i just thank God for showing me the silver lining in the grey cloud today. amin.

heylo. i watched a midsummer night's dream today.. it was.. oklah.. but i kinda prefer the other versions that i've seen.. they were definitely more interesting, in their own ways.. oh and yesterday i watched the world is not enough, the first james bond movie i've ever watched. and i realised how cool james bond movies are, and how much fun i've been missing out on.. but it's ok.. lots more fun in store for me..

See what drug you are.

See what Rugrat you are.

See what Rugrat you are.
haha interesting... a tie again.. im one heck of a mixed-up girl.

look look!!! i got bedtime bear and love-a-lot bear!!! it was a tie!!! and guess what? i love bedtime bear!!! =D
See what Care Bear you are.
See what Care Bear you are.

Which Colossal Death Robot Are You?

I'm The James Bond Villain Personality Test!

I live in a fictional world of spies and blonde women with ridiculous names, and I like to give people plenty of options. Although whether they're villainous is not optional.

Click here to find out which test you are!

Take the 100 Acre Personality Quiz!
haha.. bullshit.
--from 100 Acre Personality Quiz

You focus deeply on your values and devote your life to chasing ideals... you often draw people together around a common purpose and work to find a place for each person within the group. You're creative and seek new ideas and possibilities. You quietly push for what's important to you, and rarely give up. You might be somewhat gentle or have a good sense of humor, you could be hard to get to know and overlooked by others...you like to make the world more in line with your vision of perfection.

If you're a teenager, you probably have a bit of a rebellious streak. You might argue with others who hold different values than yourself..you probably have a small close-knit group of friends...you can relax around these pals and be pretty entertaining, since you see the world in a different and special way... that's why your posts on the Storm Palace are so great!

Inner harmony is the most important thing to you. You're sensitive and loyal. You have a strong sense of honor concerning your personal values. You'd rather communicate your feelings in writing...

You do best in a flexible situation where the teacher/collegue takes a personal interest in you...you like to interact with your peers, but not TOO much ...you have both creativity and flexibility, and you like that about yourself....you don't get bogged down by details...your job must be fun and it must be meaningful to you....you don't wanna feel conspicuous so you'll sell yourself short just to avoid the spotlight...

You can be a gentle and subtle leader...being indirect and inclusive of others...you don't confront people head-on, but rather work with 'em to get the job done....you lead with your values in mind and let these guide you...you don't like conflict, so you don't confront situations directly.. you'd rather wait for a situation to work itself out....

Leisure and kickin' back is really important to you. sometimes it is hard to separate work from play, huh? when you find a new recreational pursuit, you do a lot of reading up on it...most of your leisure things are done alone, like reading, listening to music, and even BBSing....when you want to be sociable, you can be very charming and outgoing..

Love is a very deep commitment to you...it's not easily attained...you probably pick out flaws or are disappointed when he or she doesn't match up to your ideal as to what love should be like...first dates are very well set up to make sure everything is taken care of so it can be "just right." you might have a hard time sharing feelings about others...you tell so many feelings inside that you forget to tell your partner that you love 'em or whatever....

If the relationship goes bad, you take it to heart, but probably don't tell many others about it....you have a tendency to overreact, huh? Other things to watch for...don't get so caught up in your dreams that you don't consider others' points-of-view...you might not adjust your vision to the facts of a situation...you may need a "reality check" once in a while... also, don't try to please everyone and be so hesitant to criticize... don't delay projects 'cause you're holding out for perfection...it's not gonna come...don't get overly critical because no one matches your perfect ideals... you could lash out and it could get ugly.

INFP: "I Never Find Perfection"
--from Personality test like Myers-Briggs & Keirsey personality tests

i am supposedly --
free enneagram test

but acherli --

--from Enneagram Personality Quiz

Are You Ready For Love?
Your score: 6

0-7: You are ready, willing and able!
You are so ready to get out and start looking for a partner, if you haven't begun already. You know that you would survive if you didn't meet your mate right away, but believe strongly that life would be better if you had someone to share it with. It's a proven fact that both men and women live longer and stay healthier when they have the comfort and support of a healthy relationship. So, stay positive and start flirting -- a soulmate may be standing next to you, right now!
--from Quiz: Are You Ready For Love?

You are walking to your boy/girlfriend's house. There are two roads to get there.

You chose to take significantly longer but is full of wonderful sights and interesting things.

Note:
The road represents your attitude towards falling in love. If you take the short road, you fall in love quickly and easily. If you take the long road, you take your time and do not fall in love as easily.



On the way you see 2 rose bushes. One is full of red roses, the other full of white. You decide to pick 20 roses for your boy/girlfriend

0 Red and 20 White Roses.

Note:
The number of red roses represents how much you give in a relationship, while the number of white represents what you expect in return. For example, if you chose 18 red and 2 white, you give 90 and expect 10 return.



You finally get to his/her house. A family member answers the door. You can have that family member get your boy/girlfriend or go get him/her yourself.

You chose to go get your boy/girlfriend yourself.

Note:
This question represents your attitude towards handling relationship problems. If you asked the family member to get your significant other, then you like to avoid problems and hope that they will solve themselves. If you went to get him/her yourself, then you are a more direct person and like to work out problems immediately.



You go up to you boy/girlfriend's room, but nobody is there. You decide to leave the roses. Do you leave them by the windowsill or on the bed?

You chose to leave the roses on the bed.

Note:
The placement of roses determines how much you like to see your boy/girlfriend. Placing them on the bed means you like to see them a lot, while placing them on the windowsill means that you are alright with not seeing them as much.



Later, it's time for bed. You and your boy/girlfriend go to sleep in separate rooms. In the morning when it's time to wake up you go in his/her room and check on him/her. When you arrive,

he/she is awake.

Note:
This is representative of your attitude towards his/her personality. If you find him/her asleep, you love your boy/girlfriend the way he/she is. If you find him/her awake, you expect him/her to change for you.



Now it's time to go back home. Do you take the short, plain road or the longer, more interesting road?

You chose the longer, more interesting road.

Note:
The road to home tells how long you stay in love with someone. If you chose the short road, you fall out of love easily. If you chose the longer one, you will tend to stay in love for a long time.

have you ever felt invisible? i think it's one of the worst feelings in the world. it's even worse than loneliness. at least when you're lonely, you still exist to the billion or so people in this world. but when you're invisible.. no one, and i mean no one, can see you. it's pretty sad, and quite hope-consuming too. i mean, you never know if you're ever gonna be visible again, and even if you know you are, you don't know when. so it's pretty hopeless whatever you do, cos you'll remain invisible until God decides to make you visible again. all hope is gone, and all you want to do is curl up in bed, and hide far far away from the world. but sometimes, sometimes, you've already made plans much much much earlier to be around people. you didn't know you'd be invisible during this set period of time, of course, but it doesn't change things. because you remain invisible. and by sticking to your plans, you will only end up making things worse and more painful for yourself. but really, there's nothing you can do. you've paid up, you've paid for about half-a-dozen things that you require for this whole being-around-the-people thingy, and fact is, you can't curl up far far away from the world. not on this day, at least. and you just wonder how it's gonna turn out. but you know one thing it's not gonna turn out to be.
it's not gonna turn out good. not for yourself, at least. so you just prepare yourself for a flood of tears immediately after that, plus a whole load of embarrassment.

payback time? yeah, probably.

Sangsi Asmara oleh _{Hetty Sarlene}

Di sebalik kata ada rahsia
Di sebalik senyum ada makna
Kan kubisikkan padamu
Satu hari bila perlu
Saat pasti kau jadi milikku

Biarkanlah aku menanggung rindu
Biarkanlah engkau tiada tahu
Halus kasihku padamu
Zahirnya takku lihatkan
Hingga pasti kau jadi milikku

( korus 1 )
Entah bila bermula
Cinta yang tak kusangka
Mungkin terlalu lama
Sangsi asmara... terpedaya

( korus 2 )
Berlalulah masa tak sanggup ku menanti
Gelora di jiwa tak siapa mengerti
Siksanya menanggung rindu
Sukarnya memendam rasa... kekasih

( ulang korus1 & korus2 & korus2 )

Animal Love Test from here.

What kind of person you'll be attracted to in real life situations..

C. Deer - elegant and well-mannered



In the process of courtship, which approach would make you feel irresistible...

B. Lion - straight-forward, just tell you he (she) loves you



What impression you would like to give to your lover...

B. Cat - stylish



What incident would cause you break up with your partner--which character you hate most...

C. Crocodile - ruthless, cold-blooded, ironic



What kind of relationship you would like to build with your partner...

B. Horse - both of you can talk about everything and anything, no secret is kept



Would you commit adultery...

A. Human - you care about the society and morality, you won't do anything wrong after marriage



What do you think about marriage...

C. Polar Bear - you are afraid of marriage, you think it would take away your freedom



At this moment, what do you think of Love...

A. Lion - you always thirst of love, you can do anything for it, but you won't fall for it easily

You are Civilian Calvin! You don't get to travel much outside your neighborhood, but you still manage to get in plenty of trouble. When you're not acting up, you like to wax philosophical. Take the What Calvin are You? Quiz by contessina_2000@yahoo.com!

I'm An Idealist
All Idealists (NFs) share the following core characteristics:


Idealists are enthusiastic, they trust their intuition, yearn for romance, seek their true self, prize meaningful relationships, and dream of attaining wisdom.
Idealists pride themselves on being loving, kindhearted, and authentic.
Idealists tend to be giving, trusting, spiritual, and they are focused on personal journeys and human potentials.
Idealists make intense mates, nurturing parents, and inspirational leaders.

Idealists, as a temperament, are passionately concerned with personal growth and development. Idealists strive to discover who they are and how they can become their best possible self--always this quest for self-knowledge and self-improvement drives their imagination. And they want to help others make the journey. Idealists are naturally drawn to working with people, and whether in education or counseling, in social services or personnel work, in journalism or the ministry, they are gifted at helping others find their way in life, often inspiring them to grow as individuals and to fulfill their potentials.

Idealists are rare, making up no more than 8 to 10 percent of the population. But their ability to inspire people with their enthusiasm and their idealism has given them influence far beyond their numbers.

The four types of Idealists are:


Healers (INFP) | Counselors (INFJ) | Champions (ENFP) | Teachers (ENFJ)
--The Keirsey Temperament Sorter II

Type 4: The Artist. The intuitive, reserved type.
--The New Enneagram Personality Test

Fours tend to live in a private world of their own personal ideals. They are strongly emotional people who react strongly to even little things. In the course of a day, a Four's emotions can jump between extremes. Fours are often concerned with ideal love, longing after a kind of love that they've never experienced outside of the imagination. They also have strong ideals about themselves, which, combined with highly reactive emotions, can lead them to think terribly of themselves. This makes Fours excessively prone to envy, as they see something good in others and berate themselves for not having the same qualities. The strength of Fours is that they can see the best in others. Fours often become artists, thought not all do, and not all artists are fours. The Swedish film maker Ingmar Bergmann is good example of a Four.
--from The Triadic Enneagram Personality Test

You want your partner ( girlfriend/boyfriend ) to....

D. Be a little bit more relaxed, calm and composed

NOTE:
What kind of chair do you prefer?

The message behind the question :
A chair is for sitting on . If you choose to sit on a certain chair, you have no suspicions or distrust towards it. This is the same psychology present in our relationship with the people we like. In other words, the qualities you look for in a chair are similar to the qualities you look for in a partner. Sit down for a minute and give it some thought.



With respect to money ....

A. You spend as little as possible.

NOTE:
Tomorrow is Sunday. What are you going to do ?

The message behind the question :
Sunday is a day when you are free to use however you want. Having freedom to do whatever you want is like having money to spend however you want. Becoming good at managing your finances is an important step towards independence. What do you think of your money spending habits? A penny for your thoughts.



You think good luck .....

D. Doesn't exist. Reality is built on practicalities.

NOTE:
A box lying on the road. What's inside ?

The message behind the question :
People often attribute unexpected events to good luck or bad luck. When something goes well, it's because of good luck; when things turn sour, it's the fault of bad luck. Your answer reveals what kind of luck (what's inside the box ) you think will befall you in an unexpected circumstance (the box on the road ). It's probably safe to say that people who select B or E do not buy lottery tickets.



The hidden side of your personality tends to be ....

C. Satisfied to care of things with a minimum amount of effort.

NOTE:
If you go to the zoo, what do you look at first?

The message behind the question :
When you are at the zoo, you are surrounded by caged creatures that you can't talk with, and which can't communicate with you. The fact subconsciously governs the way you act. It is very similar to how you act in human society as well. In other words, your actions reveal the hidden side of your personality.



How you relate to others...

E. You have a tendency to overdo things, but basically you value your friendships highly.

NOTE:
What kind of present would you buy for a very close friend ?

The message behind the question :
By stating what kind of gift you would give to a good friend, you are actually revealing how you relate to others. However, it doesn't really matter so much what you give someone - it's the thought that counts. If you care enough to give something,your friend will get the message. The dual acts of giving and receiving are, together, one of the finest pleasures - and one of the best forms of communication - that friends share.



When it comes to finding a romantic partner you .....

C. Don't have any particular type in mind, but are inclined to look for someone who is likely to say 'YES' if you ask him/her out.

NOTE:
You want to cross a river, but there is no bridge in sight. What do you do?

The message behind the question :
Your answer to this question reveals the way you tend to search for a boyfriend/girlfriend. Crossing a river is a psychological equivalent of getting out and finding that special someone. In any case, if you don't make an effort to meet people, there's no way any relationship is going to start at all. So, get to it !!!!
--from Reveal Yourself

Artistic Type
You love caring for others and it is the reason why you are a big sister/brother in people's eyes. People will find it interesting and comfortable talking to you, and this enables you to gain trust from them. This usually gives good impression to those of the opposite sex who are sentimental and younger than you.
--from The WebHouse.net Personality Test

fana is a big liar. she's still not online yet.

forgot to say, yesterday i saw prem.
"tell me when will you be mine..tell me quando quando quando..we can share a love divine..please dun make me wait again.. when will yu say yes to me?.. tell me quando quando quando.. you mean happiness to me.. oh my love pls tell me when.."
-sigh-

i just realised i love heineken ads.. they are soooo cool, and they play the nicest songs.. like, the currently showing ones feature "quando, quando, quando" and "can't take my eyes off you" respectively.. and the ads themselves are like, very fun and lively and stuff.. REALLY cool. heineken rocks! [is that like, haram to say, btw?]
yayy im chatting to him now. haha. i can just see him in a tux on his graduation night. wow. sometimes i love that im in a girls' school. and sometimes, i love it even MORE.

im freshly home from a day out on/at my previous second home--orchard! lovely!!! the last time i really hung out there was when i was a sec 3 gerl. and what a wonderful feeling it was today, to be a sec 3 once more..
I'M SERIOUS.
i watched the dangerous lives of altar boys with rachel lyn fana tzing. it was SO COOL! it's really good. it's one of those under-publicised movies which are excellent. like, for example, the cider house rules. yah. it's really cool and interesting and definitely different. saw the sji malay guys too. and rencong. but i didn't realise it was him until it was too late. and later at wisma, fana and i saw this nadia yeo-lim whom we both saw at bishan mac's. and about a thousand other people, including one totally poser and hot ij lim, and anudder less hot and non-poser ij lim..
ermm.. ohyah we went topshop, where i had the most fun trying on different hats.. i tried an alicia keys look, which totally failed on my round chubby face. sorry, that makes me sound too cute. my fat face. haha. i tried a white kopiah-ish hat by mistake, and i dunno how i ended up looking, but it was probably anything containing the word "bad". haha. and i tried on 2 of those beeg floppy hats, yu know, like all those black people wear? like the one janet jackson wears in poetic justice? yah those. and i looked good.. and i wasn't the only one who thot so. =D yah and i tried the milkmaid look, according to fana. just a scarf, the triangular ones, around my head. adeline thot i looked nice. but i still love the janet jackson look. so im gonna get the hat soon.. ermm.. yah and i found nice green earrings which look totally classic and old-fashioned, that im gonna get to wear with my prom dress. yah.
as fana and i were going home, someone poked me on the shoulder. it was redhuan! what a surprise! so we talked on the way to orchard mert.. and when i went home later, by 105 and 53, iskandar-!- was on 53! with his mom! isk, i mean. haha. i wanted to smile at him, but.. yu know, he's a raihan and all, i'd just embarrass myself. yah so i just stared at him ah. he got down at the next stop, btw, tua's stop.
ohyah fana and i went to pray at royal plaza hotel.. and we saw haney hadad.. and fana stage-whispered "haney hadad!" and she turned. darn. don't worry, i grinned at her. haha.
yeah. so like i said, i had a GREAT day. wait. did i even say that? nevermind, im saying it now.

hellohellohello. how is everyone? rockin' and rollin'? that's cool, just cool..! --ok, yes, im a little high right now.. haha.. not sure why. or, rather, not sure principally why.
well im just back from watching harry potter, second instalment, at tampines mall with my mom and brother. being tampines mall, there were about a thousand people including maybe 50 lims and that gerl from SAC who took the bus with me in the mornings. she was eating, so i guess she's serani, not malay-muslim. anyway, the movie was hilarious, thanks to ron's funny funny quips. he is just sooo adorable! and the fact that he and harry are squeaking owing to mid-break voices makes it even funnier! and justin finch-fletchley... well, he LOOKS LIKE TAIWAN! im serious! needless to say, i was having a hard time keeping a straight face when i glimpsed him in any part of any scene. luckily my mom diden notice.. and tom felton is SO HOT as malfoy. i was dying. he is like, suave personified. too bad he's a pilfering ass in addition to his other negative qualities. haha. yes, negative QUALITIES. i mean, it's part of what makes him so suave, i think. he's only abit younger than me rite? about 14 or 15... not bad an age difference, i should think. ermm.. yah and of course rupert grint was soooooooooooo adorably funny. sighzz.. he's so sloppily pai, which is damn cool. ohyes and in addition to all this, during the movie, HE smsed me! yay! haha. thank you, photochemical smog, for prompting a question from him.. hehe. he's such a nice guy. sigh. yeah and he did come just now!!! wearing the obs climbarock tshirt, white colour. i was incidentally wearing mine, btw. haha.
yes and erm.. gigit rantai, mrt and li di were there. li di's alive! yay! and he glanced at me alot.. kwite fun.. haha..

wahoo! guess what? this morning i took the bus with "celesta".. AND a brader.. a poser one, with his shirt tucked out entirely, and headphones.. and he's really hot too! den later after the combined science paper, "celesta" and gigit rantai came in.. yay!
haha i just opened the fridge and saw 3 entire 5-packs of yakult.. green, red and purple, i think.. and yu know the vitagen ad where the mom kneels down and helps her daughter pile 5-packs of vitagen into the trolley? my mom could do that ad.. for yakult, of course.
anyway, im gonna watch harry potter tmr! yay! thank you, brother of mine, for being kiasu.

okay i promised to put in my wonderkins scene.. so here it is.. just a lil synopsis first, though.. duncha think the guy appears to look ALOT like screw? yah, so i was thinking, mebbe it's screw and me! haha.. it looks so sweet... it's like, after a long period of not seeing each other, they meet, and they missed each other so much, they just decide to absorb each other's presence, instead of doing stupid things like pda or watever.. that's why i think of this as true love.

i just created the NICEST wonderkins scene!!! it's in black and white.. and it just looks soooo lovely... so... sweet... which is kinda ironic to sum extent cos the male character is a screw-type guy.. but that's what makes it nice, i think.. and i just realised how much i love black-and-white. and so... now that im an expert at this dolls thing, i'll put in more work on the effects part.. there'll be a marked improvement in my dolls from now on.. and don't worry, i'll put up the wonderkins scene soon..

"i know you'd kill for me,
you'd die for me,
i know you like to rip and run the streets.
but i get nervous sometimes,
baby, i can't help to think
you might not make it home to eat.
i can't sleep.
could you pick up the phone,
and call me at home
and let me know you ain't in some heat.
and don't go crying, you're grown,
you know im looking out for you,
cos you be looking out for me, me, me.." --aaliyah's come back in one piece
you see, since i watched romeo must die for the second time, i've fallen in love with aaliyah's character, trish o'day. and i wanna be like her now. yeah. my new role model. how bout that?

today: on fana's encouragement, i let her type out a msg to jeremy and send it to him ["hi.. good luck for today.."]. and he replied!!! dun worry, im saving that one. and then later he came in. i was talking to fana. and i suddenly stopped and smiled at him. i dunno, it's like, when he's around, i dun feel like doing anything but smiling. today i totally diden expect to see him, so i was speechless as well. which resulted in my failure to ask him to have a seat.. so he left. how stupid am i? ...yes, very, i know. [and when i finished my maths paper early later, i could NOT stop thinking of my stupidity] argh. please understand that i really like you. then u can decide if you like me too. fana insists that you do. but i know it's not true. <--wow a poem. anyway. there were also soccer, kunyah, SLWIDAW, gigit rantai, wei bin's fren whom [who?] i decided to call "comel", ah-pei [whom i decided to un-abang] and assorted others. ohyah a lim. a really great guangyang one, no glasses, tucked out blouse, saunters, longish floppyish hair, a cin marie plus poseurism. and later at the mrt station, 2 st. nick's lims.. woohoo! lawarrr!

top 5 kucing guys [yah i think i haf just enuff.]
1. adik eleanor
2. gigit rantai
3. soccer
4. comel
5. kunyah/the "celesta" guy

yesterday i got an sms from raihan. it sed "hey how you doin?" or sum shit liddat, which is totally not raihan's style. but i wasn't thinking, so i just replied. then i got another sms from him that basically sed sorry cos it was his fren who msged, not him. wow. what, he had rugby camp with those group of shits? or they all converted to islam and they went terawih with him?? hmphh. well mostly i was embarrassed not angry, so when i prayed isyak, i prayed to God to like, get me through this "mess" with no embarrassment on my part. and guess what? raihan just msged me back asking wad jc i wanna go, stuff liddat. so yes, i got out of this mess with no embarrassment on my part. amazing.

new dolls!

harloe. today i appear a little more happy than i acherli am. i mean, NOTHING happened today, man. how'dya expect me to be happy? it was the most boring day of my entire life. yah. the only person i saw was johnny. yah then when the bus passed pl, there were about a thousand lims, juz finished class or cca, or going for class/cca. there was this mimlim i've seen before a few times.. and she was with other lims.. real hardcore ones.. cin, of cos.. one of them was a biglim. nort cute ah! but they were, nevertheless, lims, so i just appreciate what i can get, especially today.
yesterday night i had a dream. i was in mac's with fana on a normal morning/afternoon. at a normal table. then this group of guys entered mac's, just passing through. it was alex's group, with extras: buffer zone, screw, and buffer zone's other entire gang ah. you know in ocean's eleven, when the guys like, make their entrance/exit as a group of eleven, with brad pitt [right?] heading the group? yah well, it was liddat ah. alex was the one heading the group, with his hunched gorilla-like walk. haha. sho cute. anyway, fana and i were just staring at them ah. no, make that gazing. i, of course, was gazing at screw. haha. he was, by far, the most poised. anyway, when the group was directly infront of us in the aisle, alex stopped, causing the whole group to come to a halt. and they about-turned to face us. the entire group. and then alex was like,"eh, guys, wait awhile ah.." and he walked up to us, smiling. i was all huh-ed ah. so he was just standing there, and i was looking at him ah, wondering what would happen. and he was like,"hello.." so i sed hi back. then he was like,"what are you doing?" as in what-are-you-studying, so i told him whatever ah.. then he was like oh ok. and i was like,"so where are you going?" and he replied,"play basketball lorh.." and as i nodded in understanding, he continued,"you wanna come watch?" and i was like,"uh, nolah it's ok.." and he sed,"ok lah.. see you then.. bye!" and i sed bye ah. then he gorillaed back to the front of the group. they about-turned back in one smooth move and strode out of the place to the courts, of cos. fana and i looked at each other ah. i was still in shock, you see. and we stared at each other, not saying anything. then about one minute later, we both scrambled out of the place, realising that we wanted to do that from just now. but when we reached the outside, they were already at the other side of the road. so we just stood there, dunno why we were in despair also. they diden see us ah, and i diden feel like calling out to them. so i just stared after them. then i dunno why, they all stopped again, as a group, and turned around to face us. i guess they sensed that we were there. but i diden react, i was just staring at screw ah, who was poseur-ly smirking at me. so i diden realise when alex tossed something across the road. fana was like,"eh ain.." trying to alert me, but i diden snap out of it. it hit me in the face, not painfully or anything, of cos. and i peeled it off my face. it was a leaf. those big, heart-shaped kinds like from the trees near school. and no, un-mohabbatein-style, it had nothing written on it. so i looked across the road at alex. he'd moved right to the pavement ah, while the rest were at the carpark. and he waved and sed hi!!! and i was like, hi. and he spread his arms out and sed,"i love you!" and i was just, yarh. then me and fana crossed the road and i joined him and we watched them play bball ah. yes, i know it's bullshit, but what do you expect? it was a dream. and fana, if it's abit different from how i related it to you, im sorry, i just can't remember my dreams properly.
the end.

1. he came in around 8.30... yah.. it was lovely.. then he went to skl.. and he came back a little later.. and i was sitting with him, waiting for him to do an amaths sum, then he was like,"are you hungry, do you want some food?" well, i died. how sweet! i mean, yah. sigh. well, im glad i was puasaing.. or else i wouldn't know how to respond.. mann. he is SO nice.
3. had my history paper at 2.. and im in love with one of the invigilators! haha. ok im not, but he's still cool and nice and all. ok he's not nice, maybe. but i dunno. he was wearing a white shirt [not herman-style], dark tan trousers and glasses.. and his hair is jeremy-style. haha. he acherli looks like a 5% mr. loke, 50% kenny tan, and 45% himself, i guess. haha. yeah. he was zooming up and down the aisles. well, he was literally running, anyway.. to like, attend to people ah.. and when i was waiting for the bus i saw him across the road.. wearing a backpack. i wanted to become melon then [cos she was infront of him], but it's ok. i got to look, anyway. and i must admit, i was a tad more distracted than usual becos of him. even though--and can you believe this?--shuai was like, diagonally infront of me! amazing. i just kept glancing up to look at him, sitting down, standing around, or being totally clueless. wahaha. he opened the doors of the hall too. i know, im hopeless.
2. today wei was wearing this cute white tshirt with the superman logo on it, his white bball shorts, shoes and an orange cap. sho cute. haha. den as usual he was being a jinling/raihan ah. den when fana and i were leaving, he was still outside playing cards. amazingly, he saw us. wow, dah nak blah baru dier nampak. anyway, he waved at us with his cards ah. and i was like,"hello!" just as he sed bubbye. so i was like,"bubbye!" and then he acherli asked,"going where?" and i diden hear so i sed huh. and he repeated,"going where?" and i sed,"oh, going skl, gort exam.." "ok, bye.." he replied. yeah. that was just totally him ah. but fana was pretty upset [that's an understatement] cos he hardly acknowledged her, due to the fact that he diden recognise her. ohno. i feel so bad, i mean, i dun even like him and all. but i think that's the way the world works, acherli. it's always the people who dun put in effort, who dun give a shit, who don't deserve it--who get what others want. lumrah hidup. lumrah hidup.

today rite, amazing things happened.
1. i got raihaned by 3 friends of adil's. "raihan! raihan!" they shouted out innocently. doubtless, adil did not participate directly in this ain-bashing, but he was a raihan throughout, SMILING as well, so.. i hold him fully responsible. meanwhile, over at the other side of bishan, fana was being discreetly raihaned by another group of raihan's friends. man, is that guy popular! and among misguided teens, too!
2. the thing i've been dreaming of all my life [ok, all my sec 3 life--just look at my social studies textbook] finally happened. i went home with fir. it was such a big surprise, i really dun think he goes home by mrt alot rite.. and especially not after maghrib. same with me, i dun usually go home after maghrib. but today we diden do the usual and i ended up going home with him. had a 5-second chat, and sed bye like normal friends do. but the bus was still freezing, and i wasn't floating in bliss. so. i dunno what telah happen.
3. i saw THE second most perfect aimee lim today. the first being marie. she's tall and thin and dark.. no glasses.. not poser. wears jeans and tshirts like normal people. EXCELLENT.

i have new dolls, so im gonna put a couple or so here. ok this is one of the outfits im wearing for sahabat, fana. and don't yu think this is SO selene, fana?

oh i just went through my TOD and i just wanna report that the first time i [and baba] acherli took notice of him was on september 14th. and we first communicated with him on october 21st. ok bye.

last night fana and i were at mac's at night, around 10pm.. and somehow it seemed different ah. but it was still mac's, i swear, just that it turned into a cafe-like place ah, with dim lighting and stuff. and outside, the path circling the place, it was brightly lit up by many many streetlights. so anyway, fana and i were sitting down somewhere that wasn't our normal place. it was like, the middle row ah.. and i sed to fana that i was going out for awhile.. so i went out to the front and i stood by the payphone nearer to mac's, not tidbits' payphone. i just stood there. no beer or any of the outside regulars, of course. there was, however, this group of guys in RI uniform. long pants. obviously upper sec. they were soooo conspicuous, cos of their uniform. so i looked at them, and i realised that they were raihan and friends! so i got all disgusted. but i stayed where i was. im not sure if i was waiting for someone to come along, or for that someone to call the payphone. haha. they diden see me at first. they were just standing there, talking ah. i guess they were debating whether to enter or not. then one of them glanced around and he saw me. and he instantly nudged a fren and told him. that fren nudged the next guy, and so on until the entire group of guys were looking at me. no, make that staring. i bet they were wondering what to tease me with ah. so anyway, the only one not looking at me was raihan. i suppose he was thinking that i was a basilisk, and that he'd die if he looked into my eyes; alternatively, HE was the basilisk, and he diden want me to die by looking into his eyes. i got irritated. with his friends especially. so before they could say anything, i sed crankily,"whaaat?" they all "jumped". it was almost literal. they diden say anything in reply, and i was still irritated, so i continued,"get lost lah! stop staring! stupid assholes! i diden bother you rite? stupid dumbs. GET LOST!" and while they were still gaping, i stalked off. i walked along the lighted path and entered by the back, then i plopped myself down and started ranting about them to fana. for the record, they never entered mac's that night. either they got skared off, or they got pissed off. take your pick.
don't worry, it was just a dream.

number 22 is i love the way he makes the place feel warmer the moment he steps in.

today we had lunch. yes this time i acherli ate. then we went back to our separate studying abodes.. but im still happy. even seeing wan sze diden put out my happiness. could it be true? could it really be? haha sorry that's just dumb. ohyah i wrote this just now after he came in for the first time:
you walked in.
and suddenly the place feels
so much warmer.
yes i know, it's no haiku. but it's not a cliched i-love-him shit either.

i just visited the "my sassy girl" website.. d/led a temporary 1:44 soundclip of "i believe", and listened to it thrice. it's amazing. lovely. wonderful.
so anyway. i acherli logged on to put this list on internet memory. so.. yah. but first, just a disclaimer: it's not meant to be poetic, overbearing, overemotional, touching, painful, obvious, a hint to him or anyone else, a form of mindless entertainment. cliched as it may seem [this disclaimer AND the list], _{it comes from my heart}.

i love everything about him
1. i love the way he dresses
2. i love his cute grey jacket.
3. i love his huge bottle of mineral water, and the way he drinks it.
4. i love the way his face looks, like a poly student instead of a 16-year-old.
5. i love his quirky manner of bobbing his head to whatever song he's listening to, and even singing along with it.
6. i love the way he's so patient with ANYONE when he's teaching them something.
7. i love the way he teaches stuff.
8. i love that he's so focused on his studying.
9. i love the way he carries the gigantic volume of "the lord of the rings" around.
10. i love his cute hairstyle, that goes so well with his face somehow.
11. i love that he's so friendly with EVERYONE, and i mean everyone. especially his easy manner with the kcpps boys.
12. i love his voice, at any volume.
13. i love the way he plays with his writing instruments, and drops them frequently.
14. i love the way he always tries to make conversation, even with someone like me.
15. i love the fact that he can't sit still either.
16. i love that he acknowledges ALL his friends, regardless of who he's with.
17. i love that he acherli invited me to breakfast and lunch.
18. i love that he doesn't mind studying alone. or eating alone. basically, being alone.
19. i love the way he has sooooo many girl frens too!
20. i love that he sometimes drops by in the morning just for a short chat.
21. i love the way he talks on his phone using his earpiece[s]. but most of all
i love that he makes me smile just by being there. and that i can't stop smiling for, oh, about a day after that.

1. spent the day with pencil. wonderful. except later the kcpps boys came and they cuden stop teasing me. but it was so cute when they asked him if he's from my school, and he was like,"yah my hair fell off.. stress.."
2. "lim" from cedar and her fren came back.. it's been so long.. i really missed them..
3. ooh gigit rantai was dere.. sho cute.. and wei.. and alot of people.. and as i was leaving, i saw screw, buffer zone and.. sahabat!! yay! and no beer or whoevers! amazing.

i had a wonderfully good day. i was a saint today, firstly. and i reached mac's at 7.20 and bought breakfast and i was just sitting down and jeremy came in! he sat infront of me again and asked abt chem pract, and we discussed that, then he had to go to school for a chem class or smthg. he was wearing a psl tshirt and his school trousers.
fana came later, so i decided not to go home early to kepo2 at syida's house.. and sengkuangs came.. marie n wan sze, who were there at 9-plus already.. and beer and her gerl.. parents.. ooh and a-liang and jonathan and wei ming.
den fana and i wanted to go toilet, so we decided to go to the CC one ah. and we went out by the front, cos i was hoping marie was dere.. and we went out.. and marie WAS dere.. and beer's gerl AND wan sze were gone ah.. dah balik, i suppose. and marie was sitting next to bapak. and wei was dere too.. just about to leave ah, with the 3-pointer.. fana smiled at him ah, but i was distracted by marie. den as we passed them bapak was like,"you again!" and i turned around and bapak was looking at me so i just raised my hand, konon waving at her ah. hehe. and while fana and i walked to the pedestrian crossing, wei and 3-pointer got ready to climb the fence. i looked at them ah, and wei was looking at me, den he pointed to the court, as if to ask if we were going there.. he grinned his grin and i waved at him..
oh and b4 that, madaminah was sitting outside when fana and i went out to go j8.. and i couldn't help myself, i sang "sabrina.." after i passed her.. haha. i felt so dumb.
ohyes and after about a thousand years of painful anticipation, jeremy finally turned up at around 5 ah.. yeah.. i waved at him and sed bye to him when i left.
ohyah also, after he arrived, marie came in with jack and another cinlim fren that i've seen before.. but bigger than kawan.. so we're calling her sahabat.. just cos it's longer than kawan, so i kan remember who's who..
-the end-
..and she lived happily ever after..

highlight of the day: jeremy, at 7.30 in the morning, sitting in front of me and saying hello and talking to me, before wishing me luck and leaving.
=)

this is for all the people i like, have liked, will liked, that are associated with bball in any way.
also for my friends to whom bball has a special meaning [read: fana].

i had a rotten day.
WHY COULDN'T YOU COME, JEREMY?

today pencil came. and he came up to me to ask about physics. unfortunately, i dun take physics. darn. then later he asked my name, and i asked his larh. it's jeremy, btw. hehe. and he took bio last year but he dropped it this year. ermm.. yah.
bio pract was okay. no food tests or anything, which means no fire.
aaand. ohyah after bio pract fana and i went bak there for lunch. and it was raining lyke crazy.. and beer came in with lawar, whose name is evan. and parents were there. also the cute cinlim. who we now call "kawan". that's about it.
I HAVE NEW DOLLS!

today pencil came.. and at first there were hardly any seats, so we grinned at him and pointed to the table next to us.. hahah.. anyway later i smiled at him again and he came up to us and asked us which jc we wanna go, and how many points we got. anyway, he got 10 points.. he's such a great guy.. i totally lurve him and his friendliness.. it really made my day..
and abang mrt is alive, thank god..
ermm.. yah and orange stripes guy was there.. yay..
AND soccer, who smiled at me.
AND beast and jack, who smiled at me too.
AAAAND harry, after about a thousand years.

1. dearest, darling, beloved soccer [and kunyah and anudder fren] came to mac's dis morning to study.. then baba and i left for rj first.. and later we saw them! yay! and there was pantai, david.. and.. as we passed raihan, baba was like,"raihan!" and walked away so when he turned he saw me, so i had to wave and say hi. haha. saw lynn too. erm. yah. saw shock this morning. she's in netball. alot of cedar, pl and IJ ppl going to tj... tj has rugby while rj has hockey.

anyway sorry for condensing everything there.

2. this is the big one, see.. it's about the "epiphany" [can i use that word?] i had just now, in my dream that i had before i woke up at 8pm. yes, 8pm. since im very lazy to like, type stuff today, i'll paste the conversation i had with fana:
clemmy-memmy says:
anyway
clemmy-memmy says:
when i went to tj tadi, it caused me to place tj and rj on the same level
clemmy-memmy says:
so aku tak tahu where i wanna go ah
clemmy-memmy says:
so i tried to make a decision tadi ah
clemmy-memmy says:
but i cuden
clemmy-memmy says:
den aku sampai rumah, aku tido..
clemmy-memmy says:
and i had a dream
loving yu is a torture... says:
huh?tj bagus?
clemmy-memmy says:
i dreamt that you me rachel and whoever elses were at the rj open house
loving yu is a torture... says:
ok..sorry for e interruption..
clemmy-memmy says:
[nanti aku elaborate on tj]
loving yu is a torture... says:
juz to show tt im listening..heh
clemmy-memmy says:
then kim dtg ah.. with this tall pretty gerl.. pakai like, rj tshirt ngan shorts
clemmy-memmy says:
and they came up to us ah
clemmy-memmy says:
and i was like feeling friendly, so we sed to kim den aku senyum kat that gerl and i talked to the gerl ah.
clemmy-memmy says:
aku ckp,"hello.. wat's ur name?"
clemmy-memmy says:
den dier bilang den aku tanyer,"so ure kim's fren?"
clemmy-memmy says:
den she laughed and she was like,"oh im her church counsellor" or sum shit liddat ah
loving yu is a torture... says:
hahahahaha..so funny!!super anti-climax sey
clemmy-memmy says:
den i continued talking to her and she told me she was in students' council
clemmy-memmy says:
and i was like,"oh cool! i've always wanted to join!" and she got all excited and she ran off to get like, pamphlets abt students' council for us ah..
clemmy-memmy says:
she was like,"wait for me, i'll be back.."
clemmy-memmy says:
then suddenly u guys wanted to leave
clemmy-memmy says:
so i had to follow you out of the school ah.. and we took a bus.. guess where we were? ...bishan!!!
clemmy-memmy says:
u noe, the 156 nyer bus stop nyer area
loving yu is a torture... says:
haha..then?
[21:22] <[SmiLez]> yo..can yu tok here?msn bising ah..
[21:22] bising?
[21:23] then anyway i kept saying,"eh can we please go back? i wanna go back.."
[21:23] so.
[21:23] i didn't realise it at first
[21:23] but
[21:24] <[SmiLez]> yes?
[21:24] i think it means that what i truly WANT is to go rj
[21:24] -the end-

yeah and that's the end. thank you once again, God.

hey. i had a relatively nice day today..
1. i lurveee pencil!!! today when he arrived he sat at the next table and he smiled at us!!! and of cos we smiled back.. and he even talked to us once.. wow i lurve making a new friend.. especially at bishan..
2. played bball.. the ball started rolling away, down the steps. i chased after it; fell down the steps; died. ok, not died. but i could have. it was soooo freaky. i haf a HUGE bruise on my derriere.. and it hurts everytime i move.. and i can't even stay in my favourite position [that's lying down] in comfort. plus when i got home i discovered 2 other bruises on my leg from the same mishap, of cos.. it's just that i didn't notice them just now because of the more prominent pain.
3. dere was alex today. and jing wei!
4. MRT is alive!
5. marie was around too, around 11-plus. with that ass, no less. they are SUCH a married couple, i swear. how disgusting. saw azzah too, in the bus.. haven't seen her for so long.. she hasn't changed much.. u noe, it used to be--i saw azzah 9 times to seeing marie once. but now it's the other way. can't say im complaining though. but it doesn't really make a difference either way.
that should be all. im going to rj's open house tmr. wish me fun. or DON'T wish me fun, if you'd like to spare rj the misfortune of having me as part of its bumper crop next year.

-kaoz-. the entire comp is screwed or something.. irritating...

i don't mean to make a foofaraw, but..
did you know that it doesn't matter how much you see of people that matter; how many people that matter you see..? because it's all meaningless without the people that MATTER.

let these words be your aubade--
as you rub your eyes open,
as you stretch your limber arms,
as that slow smile spreads,
think of me
thinking of you.

hey. i went to khairul's website.. and i was struck by how much he sounds like me.. on his blog, when he's thanking god and stuff..
anyway.

ineffable adj.
1. Incapable of being expressed; indescribable or unutterable: The feeling of flying without wings is ineffable.
2. Not to be uttered; taboo

therefore when one describes one's feeling at receiving a present as "ineffable", the present must really mean something to the person, right? --forgive me, i have no life, that's why i poke into others'.

i went to the vj open house yesterday.. and i saw pencil!!! and i also stopped liking ashraf.. haha.. and started liking... no one. and i've decided not to go vj at ALL. at ALL.
bye now.

ohyah today i went to bishan after.. well, after NOT going for this entire week. i missed everything! and i saw lotsa people today.. that helped to... melepaskan rindu.. i think that's the term for it... anyway.. there was buffer zone and friends.. unidentified bball guys.. the st. nick's girl.. pencil.. parents.. but the anak wasn't there so that was fine.. or at least, i diden see her.. i saw wei ming and jonathan.. but they were running from those 2 stupid girls.. rambut and gang.. but besar wasn't there.. i was totally melting at the sight of butter.. -sigh- hahahaha... ermm.. ohyeah vik was dere too.. yarh and that's it. now i come to think of it, that's not really very many people.. but.. well, at least i got some work done..

heyz. it's been sooooo long! what have i been doing? well, im not sure exactly. just fasting this entire week, so it was go home straight after school, pray, sleep and wake up in time for buka. then watch tv and back to sleep. yarh. so, as you can see, i've been pretty busy.. going home straight has been great, though! i see all sorts of people including lims, cute gabrielites, cute josephians.. and i get a seat on both buses! and i get home in time to pray, and watch mummies alive! it's win-win all the way..
yesterday i went to bits & pieces to engrave the bracelet. it's not what i expected, but i like it lots anyway. hope she likes it too. and you know what? by pure coincidence, i happened to take the bus with her. but it was soooo weird. i diden know what to say to her, and i diden know what to do.. i never thought it would turn this weird. and how i wish it wasn't.

harloe! im in encounter lab now.. freakin' bored.. yah.. so i dunno wat to do now.. dat's why im here, getting ready to publish my crap to the world.. hmm.. okay i haf nothing else to do OR say.. so. bye.!

U.G.L.Y. by daphne and celeste
[C] OK! I'm a cheerleader now!
[Chorus]
[D&C] U.G.L.Y. You ain't got no alibi you ugly Eh! Hey! You ugly [X4]

[C] I saw you walking down the street just the other day
[C] I didn't see your damage from that far away
[C] I should have got a clue when the kids started screaming
[C] You walked up to me with your buck teeth a gleaming
[C] Your hair was all frizzy and your face was a mess
[C] I thought it was a sack but it's your favourite dress
[C] You hurt the trees feelings and the birds all flew
[C] I don't mean to insult you
[C] Oh wait! Yes I do.

[D] Your teeth are yellow, they're covered in mould
[D] You're only fourteen you look a hundred years old
[C] When looks were handed out you were last in line
[C] Your face looks like where the sun don't shine
[D] Did you fall off a building and land on your head
[D] Or did a truch run over your face instead
[C] There ain't no pill cos you ain't ill

[D&C] You're ugly!
[Chorus]

[D] What you really need is to wear a mask
[D] And book that plastic surgeon fast - (Girl)
[C] You're scary - You're hairy I heard about you
[C] You're the main attraction at the city zoo
[D] You're so fat and ugly with a belly full of flab
[D] When you wear a yellow coat people shout out cab
[C] (So funny)

[D] You got eyes like a pig and your nose is big
[D] And with hair like that you should be wearing a wig
[C] Uncle Fester, remember him? I never knew that you had a twin
[D] You can't disguise your googly eyes
[D] In the Miss Ugly pageant you win first prize
[C] Yo mama says you ugly -
[D&C] You ugly!

[Chorus]
[D]
Get busy [X9]
[C] Yo mama says your ugly
[D] Get busy
[C] Yo mama says your ugly
[D] Get busy
[C] Yo mama says your ugly
[D] Get busy
[D&C] Your ugly!

[D&C] U.U.U.U.
[D] Now I feel like blondie

[D&C]
U.G.L.Y You ain't got no alibi you ugly eh! Hey! You ugly [X2]

[D] Quasimodo
[C] Camel breath
[D] Squarehead
[D&C] Ugly!

[C] Chicken legs
[D] Pig face
[C] Chin like bubba
[D&C] Ugly!

[D] Fish lips
[C] Toad licker
[D] Poindexter
[D&C] Ugly!

[C] Spaghetti arms
[D] Limp butt
[D&C] Freak shown -ugly!

[D&C]
U.G.L.Y You ain't got no alibi you ugly eh! Hey! You ugly [X1]

[D&C]
U.G.L.Y - [C] You could make an onion cry

[D&C]
U.G.L.Y - [D] Like an alien chased by the F.B.I.

[D&C]
You ugly!

faudaf's name is daryl.

hey. i had THE greatest day of my entire life. yes. THE greatest day. wow. i juz.. i dunno. wow. it was totally wonderful. awesome. tubular. and i spent it with my closest friends, my newest friends and my funnest friends..
i reached mac's at 7.24 am, ard there lah. so i waited.. and around 10-plus me baba and fana changed and went to the bball court. or we intended to, anyway. there were lower sec guangyang boys there, so we went to the cc.. and took a million postcards.. and discovered the rooftop garden and a MUCH cooler rubber playground. so we went there.. and lounged around. fana was sleeping. then my fone rang and fana woke up. and that's when she realised the court was empty!!! wow. rite? so we went there in a hurry.. and started playing.. yes, bball. yes, even me. and no, i wasn't a total washout. i got lotsa baskets kay! not as much as fana or baba, but it's ok. point is, i was wonderful, compared to my nothing performance during p.e. bball last year. hehe.. then i was holding the ball ah. about to shoot. then i turned around and saw a group of kcpss guys approaching. i was like,"lelaki!!!" and dropped the ball and ran away towards the stairs. [of course i diden run all the way, i came back ah.] hahah. it was seriously funny. anyway they diden bother us and we diden bother them.. and they were all lower sec.. and i realised one of them was alex's fren.. the one who used to work at mac's also.. anyway, yah.. later he came over to our half of the court and asked us to play 3-on-3 with them.. but we were really lousy rite, so we declined.. but later we were like, sitting down, and he came over to us again and asked again.. by this time, there were 3 guys left only, including him.. haha.. ohyah in between the 3-on-3 requests, our ball got stuck in the net and he helped us retrieve it.. haha.. after much whatevering, we just agreed.. of cos they were damn good.. haha.. one of them shoots exclusively 3-pointers.. all of them accurate.. so cool.. oh yah anyway alex's fren's name is jing wei or jing hui or smthg liddat ah.. hehe.. and they're all in sec 2.. normal tech.. yah and fana has a huuuuge crush on him.. hehe.. anyway they finally gave up playing with us.. haha.. baba left to buy them drinks.. [no, i mean 100-plus] and after that he taught us bball ah.. he is DAMN patient and nice and all dat.. and totally humble.. he was apologising for not being able to like, instruct us better ah.. cos he "only speak chinese".. is that cool or wat? sigh how i lurve making friends. during sports summore. for the first time. wait. acherli no. the st nick's gerls at bishan stadium, rem?
den later kcpps boys came.. nuraini lawar tua came.. beer was dere but i diden see her.. saw mak and bapak.. saw besar lotsa times.. oh YAH! jing wei's whole group KNOWS buffer zone! he joined them at the courts about 15 mins before they [and we] left.. yah and pencil.. the IJ gerl.. umm.. it's kok liang, not guo liang [obviously i prefer the latter].. ooh and of cos i smiled at nuraini, who smiled back.. lawar is a total B-I-T-C-H. she is the worst of all of them. she has the biggest attitude problem. erm.. ohyah.. and donovan came for maybe 10 mins. pantai came too.. and dat's about all i can remember.
i had a great day.

i saw a beautiful bird today. it wasn't REALLY beautiful, but the colours were the nicest i've ever seen on a bird.. orange beak, bright blue wings and the rest of its body was brown. leather-brown. lovely.

harloe world! it's been years, i tell ya, YEARS. so anyway, life has been treating me good. academically. not physically. physically i've been shitty, in all senses of the word. yeah. but still. i count my blessings..
i have a total of 9 points. i think. a few hours ago i was confident of the 9 points, but now im juz wondering if it really IS 9 points. i'll elaborate. i have 4 1s, i think. malay 'o' levels last year, english, e maths and chem. a couple of 2s: bio and a maths. and the rest are 3s: history, combined humans, higher malay. yah that makes up my 8 subjects. using all my 1s, i think i should get a raw 9. so.. i thank God for allowing me to have such wonderful marks. even though i hardly prayed, and hardly studied for everything except maybe chem. hence the 87%. haha. still not good enough [last year it was 89] but im glad i diden disappoint lim b e.
yeah so im gonna go now.. goodnight.

i watched keeping the faith last night. it sure brought back memories, all of them pleasant. and feelings, sum of them unpleasant. yeah. acherli, the movie isn't that great. it's not excellent, it's not terrific, it's not THAT sweet. but i still watched it for a second time. why? cos im stupid, duh. but the one thing that really strikes me in the movie is not the fact that 2 guys can be in love with the same girl, and they still remain a happy threesome with a happy couple within.. the thing is, the 2 guys can still remain friends after realising that they both love the same girl, and that one of them has already gotten her while the other can NEVER get her. they can still remain friends! the BEST of friends! isn't that amazing? it really tugs at you. and it really made me wish i had that kind of friendship.
and i watched a walk to remember today. i would like to announce, for the record, that i diden cry. i loved it, though. [might watch it again, before i return it to kamie..] plus, shane west looks like marie in the locker scene.. wahahah..
bye now.

hey. i haf great news and worrying news.
great news: i got an a1 for english. a moderately high a1, if i do say so myself. 31/40 for orals, 55/60 for paper 1, comprising 38 marks for part one and 17 marks for part two, and 37/50 for paper 2. yeah. that makes about roughly 81.9%--my a1. my second a1. [the first was malay] at least i now haf 2 1s to bank on. that leaves room for more 3s, 4s and 5s.
worrying news: that was an exceptionally high mark for paper 1. memandangkan the fact that i diden really plan part 2.. and that i was really rushing part 1. as a result, i do not trust that i will get nearly as high in the o's. so yah the worrying news is what WILL i get then?
saw train lim this morning, and a spongy mimlim at the orchard bus stop. taz then.

ohnoo.. i forgot to put in my opendiary that donovan came in with a chinese fren!!! he just finished playing bball.. and i was soooo shocked and happy to see him that i called out donovan until he turned and i waved at him! haha. dumb of me, i know. but typically me as well.

im in a good mood now, world! so dun do anything to spoil it. ohyah forgot to add in my diary that i saw hirman! without glasses! hehe. interesting sight. and i saw pantai. yah. and i feel so "popular" cos about a thousand ppl sed bye to me as i left mac's jenow.. hehe. i love having frens. it's absolutely wonderful. and having many DIFFERENT kinds of friends.. that's even better.. like nuraini.. the kcpps boys.. donovan and frens.. the ij gerl.. stuff liddat.. fun rite?

heylo. happy birthday raudhah. [not that you come here to read this or anything.. it's just that redhuan told me just now..]
1. kcpps boys were there today.. sho cute!!! now i know all their names except the small one.. the kurap one is wei ming.. and dat one.. de dat one.. is guo liang.. haha..
2. to add to my happiness, donovan, muksin and gadafi also came.. and harry.. and...
3. no beer!!! heheh. fana kalls her burp, and im gonna recommend "big" for baba to kall her. yeah. but rambut was dere.. but no screw or anything.. and i had a great time at the playground, what with the "filming" of trauma and all.. haha
k then bye.

forgot to mention. watched coyote ugly yesterday. it's GREAT! piper perabo looks like a grown up olsen twin. seriously. ok bye.

hey! guess what? today that sec 2 ij girl came again ah, as usual.. she smiled at me.. and i smiled back.. and when she was leaving, she waved and sed bye! one more new friend to add to my list of bishan friends. haha.

today the greatest thing happened. no, really.
fana and i hung out at the bishan playground today.. then we went back inside a few times ah.. and discovered that marie was dere.. as in, outside ah.. and then wan sze came.. and yah.. all dat crap.. den beast came.. den tua.. anyway then fana and i went toilet and the 2 of them happened to go toilet also.. they diden whatever us, which was a good sign.. den when we went back out, they were at the playground. marie, wan sze, beast, tua and viknesh white cap. anyway, fine so we decided to go on the rockers on the other playground ah. then after sum time nuraini came up to me and stood there ah. and i looked at her. dun remember what she sed exactly, but she asked my name so i sed "norain" lah..
then she asked,"do you like my friend?"
and i was like,"huh?" cos i was damn shocked ah, that she acherli asked me. i assumed she meant marie, although later fana told me that she thought she was talking about aishah. so up till now i still dunno, but i have a strong feeling it's marie. den i continued,"um, no.." [hey it's the truth! i stopped sum time ago.. although i still retain a kind of loyalty ah..]
den nuraini was like,"oh.. cos my fren told me.." and right here i was thinking, what friend? did aishah tell her? anyway den she walked back to her friends ah..
i dunno why, but i called out to her,"sorry!" and she turned around. so i clarified,"for making you think that.." and she just smiled ah and walked away..
later when fana and i were inside, she came in to go toilet and i smiled at her. guess what? she smiled back. so i guess she's ok with us now. i hope so. i'd still like to be friends.

today was uneventful. but filled with people. but luckily fate decided to stagger their guest appearances or i would have been completely unhinged.
our kcpps friends were there.. all of them, i think. they're all really friendly and crazy.. and when i was left alone there, they all talked to me as if we were old friends.. and later.. the cutest one came in alone [they all went playground] and packed his stuff and got ready to leave ah.. then he sed bye to me, then he sed i dropped something, and he helped me pick it up. it was my nametag!! and he bothered to pick it up, even though i could have done it cos i was nearer to it!! so yah. he's really nice. plus, he was the only one studying just now.. ohyah and now they all know my name.. and baba's and fana's too.. haha..
beast, tua and mim were there too.. at first they sat inside.. at a table facing us.. but i wasn't too skared--i just smiled at nuraini, who smirked ah. i told fana she'd make a good lim, and im serious about that. tua was listening to her discman.. she happens to burn her songs on the same kind of cds as me. haha.. oh and she cut her hair. mim was being totally extra, and nuraini was, of cos, being herself.. afterwards they went and sat outside.. but they did come in individually alot.. to go toilet ah.. and white cap viknesh came in alot also.. which he normally doesn't do.. and once i happened to masuk toilet when tua was inside.. but she diden do anything, so i assume they're dormant or perhaps even extinct for now.
anyway it was like, 6-plus.. and i was doing bio.. and three of the kcpps boys were still there, being crazy and stuff.. and like, i saw this person ah, walking with a kcpss gerl along that aisle. i was like,"wow cute guy!" skali i realised it was marie. haha. no i diden go home with them. they took a long time in the toilet, and they disappeared somewhere, presumably to berasmara dana.. haha.
yeah. that's it. bye.

i had a nice day yesterday.
1. fila lim was on the bus!!
2. MRT and his fren came at 8-plus and 9-plus respectively.. and "sipei" came at 11-plus. and erm.. hm dunno who else lah. i did 2 chem prelim papers.. and for both paper 1s, i got 36 out of forty. not good enough, seeing i got 19.5 out of 30 for section b, paper 2. so yah. i muz get full marks for paper 1.
3. jack was dere too.. and besar's gang.. ee.. and sonia and cantik came.. umm.. yah.
so basically it was a great, relaxed day for me.
then.
i just HAD to watch the last episode of ally mcbeal. the series finale. the series finale.. everytime it went to an advertisement, they'd play the opening strains of "i want love" with those random shots from the show. and everytime that happened, my heart was slowly being ripped out. im not being melodramatic. it's true. it's like, ally has always been a part of my life. and cos she's so neurotic and stuff, i can identify with her alot. of course, life goes [or went] alot better for her, especially her love life. but that's the point, see. since my life can't go that way, i just content myself with seeing sumone i can identify with leading the kind of life i'd like to have. and yesterday was like the most painful episode. with lots and lots of billy and all. i think the scriptwriters are great. they never lose their focus. i mean, georgia has an anak, rite.. but that diden come in at all. and maddie simply played a pivotal role in the entire season, but she wasn't a key character or anything. and they diden focus on billy's death, but more like his omnipresence after his departure. AND [i only realised this after the show] they diden bring in ling at all yesterday. good choice, cos she would have spoiled the mood.
anyway, yesterday it was all good friends and old flame. it was cool how i knew she "summoned" billy to come back cos she needed to finally say goodbye to him too. all this time she's kept him inside her heart, refusing to say goodbye, but yesterday night, she summoned him and said goodbye to him, along with her other good friends. yesterday she dealt with things from her past. not her present [victor and maddie and stuff], and not her future. yesterday it was her past. only them was she able to move on. and i have to do that too. but there's a time for everything, and it's not the right time for me to deal with my past yet. i gotta wait slightly more than a month. then i can move on with my life too. i was sobbing and sobbing in the closing minutes of that episode. the last episode ripped a piece of my heart out.
and i can't forget that image of all her friends standing there as she walks away from them, all teary with a smile on their lips, but their faces showing intense sorrow. and billy at the end, smiling at her.

grr..
i WAS in a good mood, then i made the cardinal mistake of going to hirman's blog. he mentioned that he was gonna find out more about "shafiqah nadiah song xiuhua for ren cong". haha. now, why does that put me in a bad mood? well, firstly, this ren cong guy was the one who whatevered me that time about hirman. i was studying alone. ALONE. and defenceless. and what does he do? he bothers me. nothing better to do. see wad i mean about RI guys? these people really spoil their image for them. so, secondly, im dying to break this ren cong's heart by telling him that she already has a boyfriend. hah. so there.
anyway, i watched the replacements just now on hbo... for the first time.. it's really nice.. i like it..

im very angry with RI guys in general. not that they ALL suck or anything. in fact, i guess maybe 90% of them are fine and normal. im just angry with raihan's friends. on thursday, i was at mac's, going to study ah. and we were sitting next to this guy, shawn zhang [sorry im kwite kepo]. he was alone. and raihan's frens, minus raihan, were sitting near the toilet.. and they were like, "teasing" us about raihan.. when fana passed them, they were like,"eh, i dunno raihan man!" or sum shit ah. and assessing her looks. waddehell? and then they were gonna leave, so they got up to go ah. but before they left, they went to shawn to tok to him ah.. they were maybe about 5 or more of them. and only 2 of them, at the most, were the original guys i saw the first time i saw raihan at mac's. my back was facing them, but fana was facing them. anyway, they were totally blocking the way out.. so ok, fine. i was still angry with them, so i sed loudly,"hey, we come here to STUDY, rite? not to like, see people ah! yah, and we started coming here a long time ago.. like, in MARCH!" and fana was like,"yah, we dun kare about seeing people.." and i went on practically screaming,"yah, we don't care about people ah, cos we come here to STUDY only. for a LONG time already." and they heard, of cos.. and they like, muttered to each other, or at least that's how fana saw it. then they left ah.. but one of them like, lingered.. he's sum fatass ah. [sorry im really not this mean all the time--slightly less--but im really angry..] and he like, covered his mouth and muttered,"byebye raihan.." and left. !!! i died. i was probably the only one who heard it [cos fana diden], and he probably meant it that way, cos he covered his mouth and all. i was soooo shocked i diden know how to react. then i started laughing/crying.. real tears were streaming from my eyes.. so i made a big show of asking fana for tissue, and pointedly turned to my right [where shawn was sitting] and dabbed at my eyes, and made sniffing sounds. i hope he reports it to the raihan protection agency. hah. thing is, after tt i msged raihan to tell him to tell THEM that i dun LIKE him. and he sed he thinks they know. so if they know, can they not get their cheap thrills by upsetting me? thanks.
on a lighter note, that same day, clemmy was dere.. he was wearing my quiksilver china berms.. the exact ones! ain't that cool? he shares my taste! haha.

help.
i need help. sum.. person just kalled my handphone.. so i picked it up. and it was sum GERL. i swear, it could NOT be a guy. and she was like,"gerl?" so i was like,"saper ni?" and she refused to say.. she was like,"tengah buat aper, girl?" and i sed i was online, and she asked with who, and i sed no one, i was just d/ling songs.. then she was all like,"oh okay, goodnight girl!" den she hung up. erm. please tell me who that was. it's kinda freaky. kinda? it IS. it wasn't aishah. really diden sound like her. wasn't mai either. but y am i just naming lims? cos no gerl in her right mind will do what that ass just did to me. please help. i wanna noe who it is. and i also dunno how to react rite now. come to think of it, she sounded kinda like shafiqah.. but i KNOW shafq would never talk to me liddat.

no time, no time. i just wanna say how i lurve donovan.. today i went there alone.. and the entire fantastic four was there.. i grinned at him.. den i bought a drink.. and passed them.. and paused to tok to him.. and i ended up talking to all of them!!! but mostly him ah.. and then i asked kurus for his name.. it's muksin or muksit or smthg. yeah ok bye.

i juz played the coolest online game ever! it's a whole stolen painting mystery, with characters and sets from lego... it is sooo cool.. and the thing is, i won all the games i had to play in my pursuit for the stolen painting.. of cos, that's cos that's a kids' game, but that's okay.. i am only at that level anyway.. bubbye.. gonna kick a punching bag now.

im pissed. but that's okay. cos 30 minutes ago i was fuming. so of cos it's better to juz be pissed.
1. why can't my brother take kare of himself? no-balls coward. no, seriously. he's in pri 6. PLEASE screw up some courage. in pri 6 i cld stay home alone just FINE.
2. i dun like to see people puking. oh, plus. i feel dumped. i'd rather be dumped by 5 guys in a row than to haf that happen. but it did anyway.
3. wow. stupid asshole bala behind me in the bus just now. wad's his friggin problem? first he pounds the seat really loud. then he sits there, and kicks MY seat periodically the whole journey. gotohell.
yeah so u kan see why i was fuming. maybe u can't. but that's okay. i would just like to recommend boxing for all. helps relieve all sorts of tension. like mine. yeah. so. try it.

u noe mtv tripleplay? where they play three videos, and you try and figure out what all three videos have in common? i could never get it right, even when it was staring me in the face. anyway. today i had a movie marathon. it's a really great way to end an entire week of relentless studying.. and a really great way of making use of the vcds my parents recently acquired. i watched austin powers in goldmember, signs and lilo and stitch, in that order.. signs totally sucked, but im glad i watched it anyway. and goldmember was by far the best.. but i liked lilo and stitch alot.. cos it made me cry.. hehe.. but my point is, it was sorta a tripleplay. cos they all had something in common. can you guess what? they all involved outer space!!! i was thinking maybe they all involved aliens, but that's not so for goldmember, so i stretched it abit and.. yah.. wow i figured out the common thing! im so happy. haha. k then. im gonna go. bye.

sorry, there's something really essential that i forgot to add.. for the greater part of the morning, and some of the evening, i was lost in london.. in the literature of tony parsons.. it's called "man and boy".. it's really good.. so i would like to thank my sister for putting this book on my bed last night.. and there was this quote..
"You drift through the years and life seems tame, then a stranger appears and love is his name." --nancy sinatra

1. raihan [wad face should i make exactly? a happy one cos he's essentially a great guy? or a pissed one, cos he just refuses to acknowledge knowing us?] came in with 2 of his friends during breakfast time. and i woke up at 6 just to reach mac's at 8. haha. oh. he left shortly after 11 or 12, i guess..
2. gemuk=donovan
kurus=[sum name starting with M, sorry, but donovan mumbles and im pekak.]
cermin mata=gadafi
tinggi=najip
3. aishah came today. i diden noe she came on saturdays. she smiled at me, den she sat with me and talked to me while playing with my fone for awhile. she thought redhuan was my guy. "where's your guy?" she asked. so i told her,"he's not my guy." den she left after a while ah..

yeah so dat's it. i really think i had an awesome time today. hehe.

1. the entire fantastic four was there today.. like, early afternoon.. and i smiled and waved at gemuk.. and the rest of them reacted ah. damn. i hope they aren't wadevering gemuk cos of me..
2. beast was there today. with unidentified, never-before-seen aimees.. and aishah was there too.. do you know, when i first saw beast today, my entire body tingled?! i did not understand it.. even my teeth was tingling.. and i felt dizzy.. it was really bad.. i really dunno wat was wrong.. it was like the kinetic particle theory of solid objects.. except i could literally feel every particle of my body vibrating about their fixed positions.. eee.. and the tingling lasted for, oh, i dunno.. 10 minutes.. at least.. i was soooo i-dunno-watted.. the cat high guys next to us muz haf thot i was nuts.. but for the record, beast n gang diden bother us..
3. i know i've never really been in love before. and i know i've never had a boyfriend before. so i dunno wat it's like. i dunno wat it might be like, i dunno anything, in other words. but this is what i wish i could be like.
Your presence brings sunshine into my heart.
You don't touch me, but i feel the comfort of your arms;
You don't look at me, but i feel the warmth of your smile.
And your strength flows into me.
Kehadiranmu membawa mentari ke dalam hatiku.
Aku tidak kau sentuh, namun keselesaan pelukanmu dapat ku rasa.
Aku tidak kau pandang, namun kemesraan senyumanmu dapat ku sentuh.
Lalu kekuatanmu mengalir ke dalam diriku.
yes i know it sux, especially the malay version, but i thought in english.. and 25% of the malay one, i had to look up in the kamus dwibahasa.. haha.. [npcc guy, this one goes out to you!]

i remember once, very recently, i thought,"why does everything happen to me?" i meant everything bad ah.. i thot that after i was threatened by beast n gang.. and i was really upset.. and i was so confused as well... i mean, i didn't exactly do anything to them.. so i reasoned it was totally unfair for that to happen to me..
then today.. i met miss leong again.. talked to her.. wow it's been so long.. and she still remembers me! and everyone else! imagine that! plus.. i saw gemuk.. "talked" to him, somewhat.. i never realised i had the courage to make friends.. and u noe.. then in the bus i realised,"yeah, everything DOES happen to me--the bad AND the good.." so.. syukur alhamdulillah..

1. good morning.. it's been a good morning so far.. plus the fact that i had the most hilarious dream about the most screwed prefectorial head elections.. anyway..
2. im going to study at the airport in about an hour or so.. at least no bitches who carik pasal there, huh? but im still bringing my penknife.. just because i always carry it in my pencil case... =)
3. listening to destiny's child's "emotion" now.. it's so nice.. unfortunately, it kinda reminds me of those days.. sigh.. haha. dun worry, im over them now, really.. juz that... the memory of it irritates me sometimes..
well im gonna go now.. eat nasi lemak.. mm.. delish.. tata..

i created 2 dolls!!!! one is modified from one of dusty's dolls, another is created from someone's base.. thanks to both of them...